A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary
surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope
and listened to the bird's chest.
After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly
said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."
The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied
the vet..
"How can you be so sure?" she protested.
"I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be
in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room.
He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's
owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front
paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then
looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted the dog
on the head and took it out Of the room.
A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat
jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The
cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of
the room.
The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry,
But as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, A dead duck."
The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys
and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the
bill.
"$150!" She cried, "$150 just to tell me
my duck is dead!"
The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken
my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the
Cat Scan, it's now $150."
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